He once said “Age shouldn’t affect you. You’re either marvellous or you’re boring, regardless of your age,” so rock God and King of Misery Morrissey shouldn’t be too upset about turning 56 today. Love him or despise him, Morrissey’s said some pretty outrageous things in his 56 years on earth, but just how many celebrities has he slated over the years?

Here’s a list of famous faces who WON’T be raising a glass of vegetarian-friendly bubbly (or a vessel of tears from the eyes of carnivores, or a cup of Johnny Marr’s home-brewed gin he’s had knocking about since the 80s, we’re not really sure what Morrissey drinks) on Moz’s 56th birthday.

1. The Queen

queen elizabeth
(Steve Parsons/PA)

It’s probably safe to say that dear old Queen Liz won’t be joining Morrissey in a slice of vegan cake on his big day. After all, he did compare her to Muammar Gaddafi in 2011 and dedicated an entire song to his hatred of Her Majesty and her family, crooning “Her very Lowness with her head in a sling, I’m truly sorry but it sounds like a wonderful thing”.

2. The Middletons

The Duchess of Cambridge
(Christopher Pledger/Daily Telegraph/PA)

According to Morrissey, Kate is an “airhead” who “became ‘royal’ simply by answering the telephone at the right time”, while her sister Pippa is branded a “thickwit” in a scathing attack on her hunting habits.

3. Prince Charles

The Prince of Wales
(Yui Mok/PA)

After an Australian student shot at the Prince in 1994, Morrissey mused: “I wish that Prince Charles had been shot. I think it would have made the world a more interesting place”. Ouch.

But it doesn’t stop there – Moz took to his fansite True to You to lay into Charles once again after the Black Spider memos were published, revealing the Prince’s support for badger culling. Unsurprisingly, this didn’t go down very well with Moz, who launched into nine paragraphs of lengthy explanation as to why Charles and badger cull supporters should eff off, which concluded with “Relieve Britain of your abysmal family and please, I beg of you, quietly resign”.

4. Beyonce

Jay Z, left, sits with his wife, singer Beyonce
(Kathy Willens/AP)

Apparently Beyonce and Beyonce alone is responsible for the dying rhino population. Morrissey said: “The rhino is now more or less extinct, and it’s not because of global warming or shrinking habitats. It’s because of Beyonce’s handbags.”

5. Bob Geldof

Sir Bob Geldof
(John Stillwell/PA)

Moz famously slammed the Boomtown Rats frontman in 1985, saying “Bob Geldof is a nauseating character”. He called Band Aid “the most self-righteous platform ever in the history of popular music,” and called the single Do They Know it’s Christmas “an awful record, considering the mass of talent involved”.

6. Michael Buble

Michael Buble
(Matt Sayles/AP)

Moz made an off-the-cuff comment about poor Jazz FM favourite Michael: “The fire in the belly is essential, otherwise you become Michael Bublé — famous and meaningless”. Ouch.

7. Madonna

Madonna
(Jordan Strauss/Invision)

In an 1,300 word essay on his distaste for the Brit Awards and one of its standout performers, Madonna, Moz noted, “had had a quiet 2014 (but who is quite usefully about to release her new album!), yet here she is again promoting her frightening career on the Brit Awards even though her music has not ever said anything at all about British life.”

That’s not the first time he’s slated her Madge. In 1997 he said: “Madonna reinforces everything absurd and offensive. Desperate womanhood. Madonna is closer to organised prostitution than anything else.”

8. Kylie Minogue

 Kylie Minogue
(Silvia Izquierdo/AP)

Poor Kylie didn’t just get slated in a blog post or in an off-hand comment in an interview – Moz slagged her off on stage during his performance at Wireless Festival in 2008. Morrissey sarcily drawled that he was “absolutely thrilled” to see the singer pick up an OBE for her services to music, adding: “I’m sure you’ll agree, it was completely deserved”.

9. Sir Elton John

Elton John
(Sylvain Gaboury/AP)

In 2002, Moz complained about EJ’s over-sharing, saying “He [Elton John] is pushing his face in all the time, and telling us about his private life. Nobody’s interested, he’s incredibly rich, he should just go away, and he’s just hoisting his problems onto everybody and working them out publicly and…I’ve said enough.”

10. David Cameron

David Cameron
(Lynne Cameron/AP)

Possibly Moz’s most amusing spat is with Prime Minister David Cameron, after he put This Charming Man on one of his Desert Island Discs in 2010. They might not agree on much, but both Johnny Marr and Morrissey put on a united front against the Etonian approving of their music. Marr said: “I do forbid him to like it. He shouldn’t like us because we’re not his kind of people.”

It wasn’t long before Morrissey chipped in with: “I would like to, if I may, offer support to Johnny Marr who has spoken out to the media this week against David Cameron. David Cameron hunts and shoots and kills stags – apparently for pleasure. It was not for such people that either Meat Is Murder or The Queen Is Dead were recorded; in fact, they were made as a reaction against such violence.”

11. Bryan Ferry

Bryan Ferry
(Kin Cheung/AP)

Brian Ferry is another one in the dog house for his treatment of animals, as according to Moz he’s an “avid hunter”. Morrissey wrote on his True to You fansite: ”I apologise very deeply for my support over the years for the group Roxy Music. I had no idea [about] their singer.”

12. David and Victoria Beckham

Morrissey told Loaded magazine: “I’d… have the Peckhams (Beckhams) dragged to the edge of the village and flogged because they are insufferable to anyone of intelligence, and they actively chase the paparazzi.” Lovely.

13. Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga
(John Shearer/AP)

In an interview with Billboard, Morrissey said that Lady Gaga was “nothing new” and called her style “fraudulent, and the exact opposite of erotic.”

14. Jamie Oliver

Jamie Oliver
(Ian West/PA)

In one of his most bizarre outbursts to date, Morrissey wrote: “If Jamie ‘Orrible is so certain that flesh-food is tasty then why doesn’t he stick one of his children in a microwave?

15. Robert Smith

Robert Smith of The Cure
(Zak Hussein/PA)

Over the years Morrissey has called the Cure’s Robert Smith many unpleasant names, but our personal favourite is “a whingebag”.

16. Richard Madeley

Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan
(Matthew Fearn/PA)

Not even dear old Richard has escaped the wrath of Moz’s ever-scathing tongue. Of affable Mr Madeley, Morrissey said: “He referred to me as an ‘insufferable puffed-up prat’. This is a bit rich coming from a man who actually married his own mother.”